At ChildWild blog, one mom of two has a great post about how she slowed things down in her home. She realized that what they were doing wasn’t feeling at all slow, connected or even enjoyable. After careful consideration of both time and money, they quit everything and are now enjoying some freeform afternoons and evenings together as a family. This is what worked for them.

You may remember another post here about another family who examined their busy schedule and realized that yes, this was what they wanted and so, in the midst of all the activities, they were going to find ways to slow down, connect and enjoy things as they were. Not quit things, just be conscious of how they were moving through them.

The point being every family has to find their own slow. It looks different in every household and even within each household it might look different every season. In order to find your family’s slow, ask yourself this question, “Is this working for us?” And if you need a little more guidance than that, you can download our slow family workbook. It has some simple tools for helping each family get where they want to be.

As noted in the last post, our own Carrie Contey gave a beautiful talk at the Tedx event here in Austin last week. While we’re still awaiting videos of the event, these amazing post-it note records from Austin artist Austin Kleon, are a pretty great capture of some of the ideas presented. Here’s his rendition of the good doctor Contey…

Slow Family Living is also  in Rhythm of the Home, an online quarterly magazine celebrating warmth, celebration, play and connection for happy, creative, connected family life. In addition to the article about the whys and ways of slowing down, connecting and enjoying family life, there is a super sweet picture of my husband and son taken on a family camp out a few years ago.

Our nugget of the week. Or month. Or random segment of time as the case may be…
Behold the Power of the Pause.

In our days, weeks, lives,
Whatever we see, hear, feel, read,
Allow it in.

And take a pause.

In the pause is the integration of all of life’s inspiration.

So, before you move on.
Before you react.
Before you continue to do, do, do…

Just be.

Allow the power of the pause.

If you’d like to sign up to receive our very randomly spaced Nuggets of Goodness send us an email and put NEWSLETTER in the heading.

We had a great teleclass last night with folks calling in from several different points. We discussed what’s working. What’s not. And perhaps the most resounding, what’s the feeling you’re going for this holiday season. All callers left with some good nugget to take with them into their holiday season. Thanks to all who called in.

We talked a bit about gift giving too and how to keep it in check and fill it with the spirit we are seeking this season. In our house what works for us is to focus on handmade and homemade and on the rituals that allow the whole season to be celebrated.

At Future Craft Collective, my other collaborative endeavor, we just finished up a great round of advent calendar making and each calendar made is so unique – not just in its look but in its purpose too. Some countdown to Christmas, others to New Year’s and still others to solstice or Three Kings Day.

The season is here. And it is ready to be celebrated. In any way, shape or form that you so choose. Make it yours. Make it work for you and your family. And make it something to be enjoyed, not merely endured.

I started to spiral a little bit into holiday blues this past week. I was worrying about the consumption of it all and not exactly finding the spirit needed to bring me joyfully into this season. In an effort to combat the blues and bring in the cheer, I made a short list of what I wanted this month…

• connection with family and friends
• celebration of the season
• baking
• crafting
• sharing my good fortunes with others
• kindness
• a spirit of giving
• comfort and joy

As I looked at the list I realized all the things I want are completely attainable. And all are well within my power to make happen. We hung our Advent Calendar (finally) which consists of tiny pockets full of trinkets which get pinned onto the tree. In each pocket I also stuck a little note full of ideas for giving of the spirit. I crafted with some mama friends last night. And today, on this chilly rainy Sunday afternoon in Austin, TX I plan on doing a little holiday baking with the kids. And each time I start to spiral into overwhelm, I’ll look at my list for inspiration.

How do you create the spirit you want around the holidays? Do you know how you want the holidays to look and feel? Will you count down the days with joy this holiday? Or cross them off in a race of endurance?

If you need some ideas, we are having a tele-class Monday night from 7:15-10:00pm central time.

It’s sometimes hard to remember that our children are our people. They are the ones we are tending to now as small children, and the ones too we’ll want to spend time with later, as adults. And, though it’s hard to remember sometimes, in the thick of early parenting, our relationships with them as adults will be for a whole lot longer than our relationships with them as children.

This realization is one of the very founding reasons we created Slow Family Living. Our goal is not to tell people how to parent, but rather to offer ideas, tips, tools  and inspiration for finding ways to build that sustainable connection with your children; with your people.

While Slow Family Living is about offering lots of ideas, it is not about offering more dogma. It is not about supplying one way of doing things.

It is about slowing down long enough to find ways to build connection.  And it is about encouraging families, parents, children to see that family life can be enjoyed, not merely endured. Here is a very simple list from our Slow Family Living workbook of what we think Slow Family Living is…

• Continuously asking “Is this working for us?”
• Finding ways to live the life you love
• Knowing you have choices
• Consciously making decisions
• Doing things because it feels right for your family
• Taking into consideration each member of the family and their stage of development
• Making the family unit your priority
• Sometimes taking a stand against the status quo
• Possibly doing it differently than the way it was done for you
• Trusting that what you have to offer your family is enough
• Seeing, hearing, appreciating each other as individuals while seeing the family as an entity
• Believing that there is no right way, just the way that feels right for your family

Sometimes it’s about checking out. Other times it’s about joining in. And it’s always about slowing down, connecting, and finding ways to enjoy family life, now and for the life long haul.

Perhaps you read the article in this week’s Time Magazine by Nancy Gibbs about overparenting, slow parenting, free range parenting. Perhaps that is how you found us.  We are certainly glad to be a part of it all. And glad too, to have had Nancy Gibbs sitting with us for our Slow Family workshop sharing in the conversation and eating, yes, gluten free, dairy free, locally made coconut ice cream. Because one thing for sure about Austin,  it is chock full of all types of entrepreneurial and extremely creative and passionate individuals, foodies among them.

The tag line for Slow Family Living is slow down, connect, enjoy. Our goal in all of the work we do, our e*books and workshops and talks and blog posts and interviews, is to help families find ways to do just that. To pause. To connect. And to truly enjoy family life.  Of course, what is slow looks different in every household, but what remains the same is the fact that if we want to build lifelong family connection, we can start putting it in place now, creating small connections in the day to day: eye contact, ritual and tradition, talking, familial incubation, and pausing, as a family unit, to check in with each other and create intimate connection. For now and for the long haul.

There are scientific reasons why slowing down is important. In order to integrate all we see, hear and learn in a day, our brains must be given the chance to absorb the information into our whole selves. And there are emotional reasons too. When we slow down we are given the chance to see, hear, feel and understand each individual and the family as a whole, and ask the ever present question, “is this working for us?”

If this is your first time here, we hope you’ll browse around and read our blog posts and our manifesto and articles and maybe download our e*books as well. In their 30 some odd pages, they are full of good information and writing exercises for finding ways to live family life the way that feels best  for you. Because one thing for sure, family life looks different for each and every family. But the desire and need for connection are truly universal themes.