Comments on: How do I set boundaries for my child? http://slowfamilyliving.com/2009/04/how-do-i-set-boundaries-for-my-child/ Slow Family Living Fri, 03 Sep 2010 02:12:55 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: Tips for Early Toddlerhood – Early Parenting http://slowfamilyliving.com/2009/04/how-do-i-set-boundaries-for-my-child/comment-page-1/#comment-706 Tips for Early Toddlerhood – Early Parenting Sat, 14 Nov 2009 12:43:50 +0000 http://slowfamilyliving.com/?p=464#comment-706 [...] behavior is something it is not. Here’s a post we did over on the Slow Family Living site on boundaries that is worth reading. Here are a list of books I highly recommend My top picks are Your [...] [...] behavior is something it is not. Here’s a post we did over on the Slow Family Living site on boundaries that is worth reading. Here are a list of books I highly recommend My top picks are Your [...]

]]> By: Marleen http://slowfamilyliving.com/2009/04/how-do-i-set-boundaries-for-my-child/comment-page-1/#comment-609 Marleen Mon, 22 Jun 2009 09:27:35 +0000 http://slowfamilyliving.com/?p=464#comment-609 Sorry Tanya, but I don't agree totally. Try never to freak out in front of your children, I learned it with my eldest, dear, dear child. BUt boundaries are not about sliding down with help, that is in my opinion something a child can do alone when it's capable of it. And ones it's capapble, it will be the next day too, even when mum or dad is tired. It a boundary the child will feel itself. And when the child is cranky, it won't slide of. Letting it stay on the ground, just because of mum, it won't learn to trust it's own body. I think boundaries are about communication with eachother, how can I ask for something, being polite. And boundaries are about not too much toys in the house (or room), children aren't always able to choose and concetrate. Not too much television-hours a day. About setting limites to the world your child has too deal with. This is my Dutch (a bit Calvinistic) opinion. Sorry Tanya, but I don’t agree totally. Try never to freak out in front of your children, I learned it with my eldest, dear, dear child. BUt boundaries are not about sliding down with help, that is in my opinion something a child can do alone when it’s capable of it. And ones it’s capapble, it will be the next day too, even when mum or dad is tired. It a boundary the child will feel itself. And when the child is cranky, it won’t slide of.
Letting it stay on the ground, just because of mum, it won’t learn to trust it’s own body.

I think boundaries are about communication with eachother, how can I ask for something, being polite.
And boundaries are about not too much toys in the house (or room), children aren’t always able to choose and concetrate. Not too much television-hours a day.
About setting limites to the world your child has too deal with.
This is my Dutch (a bit Calvinistic) opinion.

]]> By: Tanya http://slowfamilyliving.com/2009/04/how-do-i-set-boundaries-for-my-child/comment-page-1/#comment-144 Tanya Thu, 09 Apr 2009 23:34:19 +0000 http://slowfamilyliving.com/?p=464#comment-144 Bernadette...Thank you! Yes, a code sounds great. Such a simple answer, but when you're in the middle of it, it's hard to think of a solution that works for everyone. We tag team often...now we have a better way to transition in and out of it. Thanks again :) Bernadette…Thank you! Yes, a code sounds great. Such a simple answer, but when you’re in the middle of it, it’s hard to think of a solution that works for everyone. We tag team often…now we have a better way to transition in and out of it. Thanks again :)

]]> By: admin http://slowfamilyliving.com/2009/04/how-do-i-set-boundaries-for-my-child/comment-page-1/#comment-143 admin Thu, 09 Apr 2009 17:28:35 +0000 http://slowfamilyliving.com/?p=464#comment-143 Thanks for this Sierra. What a great example. Thanks for this Sierra. What a great example.

]]> By: Sierra http://slowfamilyliving.com/2009/04/how-do-i-set-boundaries-for-my-child/comment-page-1/#comment-142 Sierra Thu, 09 Apr 2009 04:05:59 +0000 http://slowfamilyliving.com/?p=464#comment-142 I did this today. I was distracted, tired and a little cranky. I told the girls straight up I did not have the resources I normally do. Several times throughout the afternoon they wanted to do something (paint, help me cook, climb on furniture, get out a particularly messy toy) and I said no. "Why?" "I'm not up for that right now. I'm tired and stressed and can't make it safe and fun for everyone." Sierra (http://childwild.com) I did this today. I was distracted, tired and a little cranky. I told the girls straight up I did not have the resources I normally do. Several times throughout the afternoon they wanted to do something (paint, help me cook, climb on furniture, get out a particularly messy toy) and I said no. “Why?” “I’m not up for that right now. I’m tired and stressed and can’t make it safe and fun for everyone.”

Sierra (http://childwild.com)

]]> By: admin http://slowfamilyliving.com/2009/04/how-do-i-set-boundaries-for-my-child/comment-page-1/#comment-140 admin Wed, 08 Apr 2009 16:27:33 +0000 http://slowfamilyliving.com/?p=464#comment-140 Tanya, I think when one is overwhelmed, the other can just step up and take over. The tag team parenting allows the one feeling low to take a break while the stronger one can be there and allow whatever they need to allow. Coming up with a code between the two of you can help avoid the feeling of being judged by the other - view the code as an allowance rather than a judgment. Bernadette Tanya,
I think when one is overwhelmed, the other can just step up and take over. The tag team parenting allows the one feeling low to take a break while the stronger one can be there and allow whatever they need to allow.
Coming up with a code between the two of you can help avoid the feeling of being judged by the other – view the code as an allowance rather than a judgment.
Bernadette

]]> By: Mary Louise Penaz http://slowfamilyliving.com/2009/04/how-do-i-set-boundaries-for-my-child/comment-page-1/#comment-139 Mary Louise Penaz Wed, 08 Apr 2009 10:53:25 +0000 http://slowfamilyliving.com/?p=464#comment-139 Good one to remember. Thanks for this simple, do-able, elegent way to treat young people with respect. Slow down, in other words. Disrespect is quick and therefore hard, respect is slower but soft, kinder. :-) Good one to remember. Thanks for this simple, do-able, elegent way to treat young people with respect. Slow down, in other words. Disrespect is quick and therefore hard, respect is slower but soft, kinder. :-)

]]> By: Christine Louise Hohlbaum http://slowfamilyliving.com/2009/04/how-do-i-set-boundaries-for-my-child/comment-page-1/#comment-138 Christine Louise Hohlbaum Wed, 08 Apr 2009 08:26:57 +0000 http://slowfamilyliving.com/?p=464#comment-138 Beautifully put - as I place boundaries for my surroundings, I honor the still voice within. I have often contemplated how that might be confusing for my kids when some days I am more fit than others. Thank you for allowing us parents to be human, too! A most empowering post! Beautifully put – as I place boundaries for my surroundings, I honor the still voice within. I have often contemplated how that might be confusing for my kids when some days I am more fit than others. Thank you for allowing us parents to be human, too! A most empowering post!

]]> By: Tanya http://slowfamilyliving.com/2009/04/how-do-i-set-boundaries-for-my-child/comment-page-1/#comment-137 Tanya Wed, 08 Apr 2009 00:15:42 +0000 http://slowfamilyliving.com/?p=464#comment-137 I totally get this. It resonates. Daryl and I were talking about this post, and what happens when we're both with our daughter, but Daryl and I are at different temperaments? At any given time, this happens a lot. He may be more mellow, and open to more, but I've had enough, and want to snap and go batty. Then at times I'm as cool as a cucumber, and feeling that I totally get Mia and her needs, but then Daryl seems not able to be on the same page and uses a stern voice. I totally get this. It resonates.
Daryl and I were talking about this post, and what happens when we’re both with our daughter, but Daryl and I are at different temperaments? At any given time, this happens a lot. He may be more mellow, and open to more, but I’ve had enough, and want to snap and go batty. Then at times I’m as cool as a cucumber, and feeling that I totally get Mia and her needs, but then Daryl seems not able to be on the same page and uses a stern voice.

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